Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Farewell England

As of tomorrow my service in the UK will be completed, and I will be on a plane back to the United States. What lies ahead for me is vague and uncertain. However, I do know that this year of serving and living in England has molded me into a different person, and has greatly influenced where I want my future to go.

So how do you sum up an entire year of your life abroad? Numerous times I've tried, but whenever someone asks me that question words escape me and I usually only utter a description that is lacking to say the least. England has gone from being a place that never even crossed my mind to visit, to a place that has now become my home. Names have become faces, faces acquaintances, acquaintances have transformed into friends, and these friends I now call my family, a fact that I am ever so blessed for. I have experienced more acceptance and love here than I ever anticipated, and I can truthfully say that I have never possessed this many copies of people's house keys, automatically being accepted into their lives and families when most of them barely knew me.

As I leave England, I'm filled with excitement about returning to my friends and family, yet I am also saddened to be saying good-bye to a place and people that I have fallen in love with. To briefly sum up this year I would say I've listened, observed, learned, grown, embraced a new culture, loved, served, laughed, cried, been blessed, experienced incredible things as well as some things I wish had never occurred, and been challenged in every aspect of my life. I only hope that I am challenged further when I return to the States, and that I carry a part of England with me wherever I go.

A couple weeks ago I read a prayer by Sir Francis Drake, and I believe it is applicable for everyone, especially since it is so easy to become comfortable in our own lives. I spent this year abroad being uncomfortable in a foreign environment, and it has been one of the greatest things that has happened to me, being able to serve people here and learn from them and their way of life. So, as I return to the comfort of a culture and country that has always been familiar to me, I echo this prayer for my life:

"Disturb us, Lord, when we are too well pleased with ourselves.
When our dreams have come true
Because we dreamed too little,
Because we sailed too close to the shore.

Disturb us, Lord, when
With the abundance of things we possess
We have lost our thirst
For the waters of life;
Having fallen in love with life
We have ceased to dream of eternity
And in our efforts to build a new earth
We have allowed our vision
Of the new Heaven to dim.

Disturb us, Lord, to dare more boldly,
To venture on wilder seas
Where storm will show Your mastery;
Where losing sight of land,
We shall find the stars.

We ask You to push back
The horizons of our hopes;
And to push us in the future
In strength, courage, hope, and love.
This we ask in the name of our Captain, who is Jesus Christ.

Amen."

Through coming to England, I have been "disturbed". I hope my life continues to be so, so that I may be able to serve people to a greater degree and continue to grow in my relationship with Christ. Thank you all so much for your prayers, encouragement, and support. I wouldn't have made it through this year without you.

Peace.



On a different note, here are a few of my favorite things about England:

1) Tea breaks. Literally every time you go to someones house, every hour, before you eat, immediately after you eat, right when you wake up to start the day, and even when you're crawling into bed at night a cup of tea should be in your hand.
2) Standing in line at a coffee shop waiting to be served for at least 10minutes when there is only one person in front of me...it turns out baristas are very friendly here and regardless of how long the line they care about how everyone they serve is doing.
3) Custard creams and digestives....two of England's best biscuits....or should I say "cookies".
4) Roundabouts---truly one of the greatest inventions ever.
5) Public transportation is INCREDIBLE!!! Traveling across the country is so simple here with the access to trains!
6) If you go for a hike you plan the route based on where the pubs and tea rooms are located...it doesn't matter if the hike itself is gorgeous or boring as long as there's pubs and tea rooms along the way!
7) In North England where I'm based life is a lot slower, more relaxed, and people take time to stop, rest, and simply be.
8) Mail is delivered by people on bicycles....how cool is that?
9) The hats women wear to events, such as weddings and horse races, are absolutely phenomenal in their own way, and it's so much fun to see who is wearing the best one.
10) Open-air markets held throughout the week where you can buy almost anything you could possibly think of or want.
11) Cows roam freely in open-pastures on the outskirts of town...and occasionally they actually pay us a visit in the town itself.
12) Serving is important here, with many people doing a full-time volunteer year between high school and college.

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Be Blessed.

I moved to Beverley in one suitcase, in hopes of simplifying my life and also out of sheer laziness. I passionately loath having to drag around bulky pieces of luggage for excessive amounts of time. Even the thought of it makes me cringe. Therefore, I packed what I deemed as the minimal amount of clothing I believed necessary to hold me for a year. This same principle applied to my shoe choices. I packed only those that were essential to help me "survive England": Rain boots, running shoes, chacos, tennis shoes, and of course, my TOMS. It didn't ever occur to me during the packing process that I may actually have to go to events this year that required me to dress up. Although I packed one dress and a skirt, "nice" shoes never entered my mind. Ergo, my TOMS which are battered, torn, patched, and faded from years of wear, have now accompanied me to numerous formal affairs and have become well known by all in the Beverley area. Europe's sense of fashion has clearly had little impact on me. :)

Tuesdays I lead support groups with a friend for girls in the local high school. And, as all schools in Beverley, this fine institution requires uniforms and has a strict dress code that even has rules to inform the girls how high up pony tails can be on their head. Thus, there I am, every Tuesday, dressed up and rocking my TOMS.

This past Tuesday when we had finished working at the high school my dear friend and I decided to go out for coffee, as one must do if you live in England. On our walk to the coffee shop she mentioned that her son had just boughten her a pair of TOMS, and she has completely fallen in love with them. This gift is precious since she has had a horrendous year with tragedies one wouldn't wish upon one's greatest enemy, she doesn't currently have very much money, and her son rarely buys her gifts.

Thrilled to have a fellow-TOMS lover finally with me in Beverley I began to gush like a giddy school girl about the shoes, how I feel instantly connected to people that I see wearing TOMS because they have to care about people and the world seeing as how they purchased a pair of TOMS, and for every pair that is boughten a pair of shoes is sent to someone who doesn't have any. How could someone that buys these shoes not be an incredible person that I should be friends with? I continued to discuss the incredible aspects of these shoes with my friend, and even went as far to inform her that someone once told me that "TOMS aren't just a shoe...they're a lifestyle." All my frivolous chatter continued, and we finally reached the coffee shop, yet my friend kept walking, insisting that I go with her as she wanted to show me something.

Shortly, we arrived at a shop full of TOMS! My excitement was evident as I ran around examining the various shoes, all the while my friend stood silently watching.

"Pick one," she said.

"What?"

"Heidi, I want to buy you a pair of TOMS. Don't look at the prices. Just pick one."

If I was an emotional person I would have started crying in the middle of the shop, but that's not exactly my style. Instead, I stood speechless. Here was my friend who has so little willing to give so much of it to me. Me. The one that has come here to serve, ending up being served. What my friend did for me, although to many may not seem like a great gesture, means more to me than I can adequately express.

As I stood dumbfounded, groping for words that seemly had escaped me, attempting to piece together how I could verbalize my gratitude to sufficiently reveal to her the extent to which she had moved me, she just smiled and said:

"Be blessed."

Blessed. This past year I have been blessed by the individuals I have encountered in more ways than I have probably blessed anyone. Ironic how that is. Yet isn't blessing others what Christianity is all about?

2 Corinthians 8:1-2 says, "And now, brothers, we want you to know about the grace that God has given the Macedonian churches. Out of the most severe trial, their overflowing joy and their extreme poverty welled up in rich generosity."

Here the churches in Macedonia were going through a difficult time and they didn't have much, yet they never ceased to give. They continued to bless people, to look after one another, to share God's love. And because of this they were blessed even more.

Too often, especially in the States where we have so much, we become incredibly materialistic, focusing predominantly on our wants and needs and having the best of everything, placing ourselves before others. But that's not what it's about. What's better, to have all the material possessions that you want/"need", or to show others love by giving them something, blessing them, serving them?

2 Corinthians 9:6 says, "...and whoever sows generously will also reap generously," and 2 Corinthians 6:10 says, "...having nothing, and yet possessing everything." They had few material goods, yet they had everything because they had numerous other blessings from God. They had love, joy, and the support from each another. That is the essence of Christianity: Support each other through both good and bad times, whether this means giving material goods or providing emotional support or doing a random act of kindness/service. That is what we are called to do on a daily basis. And truthfully, most of the time it doesn't even actually take that much effort to bless someone else. So now please stop reading my blog already and go out there and do something nice for someone to brighten their day! :)

And remember.....be blessed!

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Easter Reflections

Last week, just in case you aren't aware, was Easter! From the moment I got to England my supervisor has been reminding me that Easter is the busiest time of the year in the Anglican Church. After surviving last week, I support that statement 100%. Not only was there a massive amount of preparation that went into each service, but there were added church services and cleaning responsibilities, and food preparation throughout the week. But through all these activities, Easter took on a whole new meaning for me.

Maunday Thursday began with a Blessing of the Oils service at York Minster, in which we gathered oils for baptisms, healings, and confirmations. That service in itself was a lengthy ordeal, where people congregated from all over Yorkshire to pick up the blessed oils for those in their church whom requested them, listen to the Archbishop of York and the Bishop of Whitby speak, receive Holy Communion to commence the beginning of Easter weekend, and of course, to enjoy a nice hot cross bun after the service had finished (which fyi was the first time I've ever had a hot cross bun, and it was delicious!).

While at this service I got to talking with the Archbishop of York, who is one of the most jovial people I've ever met. A constant smile on his face, I learned that he had endured many hardships while he lived in Uganda, and that he had to eventually flea the country because his life was in danger. Yet in spite of the difficulties he has encountered, he's incredibly positive and willing to do anything to serve God, even give up his own life. As I was talking with him he mentioned that he was the one who came up with the idea of serving teas, coffees, and hot cross buns after the service, which has now become a yearly tradition. After all, Easter, although a time for reflection on the greatest sacrifice ever given, should be a celebration complete with a party more than a time of somber remembrance, because of the incredible thing that Jesus did for us.

And what a celebration Easter turned out to be. Beginning my day at 4:30am (which is ridiculously early even if you are a morning person!), I helped my supervisor and his family prepare for the breakfast we were serving after the sunrise service on the Westwood pastures, one of my favorite places in Beverley where cows roam freely to graze, people play golf or take their dogs for walks, and families bring their children to play in the wide open fields. I've never been to a sunrise service before for Easter, and this one was incredible. People from multiple congregations came together, singing praises to God as the sun began to peak over the hills waking up the new day, celebrating the fact that Christ conquered sin and death, and we are now free. At the conclusion of the service we had tea, coffee, and an amazing breakfast for everyone to partake in. I honestly haven't seen that many happy people so early in the morning! And what a better way to start Easter, than to begin it with fellowship, breakfast, singing, the glorious sunrise, and excitement over what Jesus has done?

The rest of Easter consisted of more celebrating by helping out at 3 more church services, having a meal with some friends, and then reflecting on the incredible life that Jesus led, as well as all the work related events that I had been involved with throughout Holy Week. A few of these events during the week included a Friday morning service, 24-hour prayer at a fellow church in Beverley, a silent walk throughout the town to reflect on the events of Good Friday, Saturday morning prayer meetings, and various other happenings, but the thing that stood out to me the most wasn't the celebrating or the other ceremonies like the Archbishop talked about. It was our service on Maunday Thursday.

We had a "sample" of a Seder Meal, which is the traditional feast that Jews have to mark the beginning of the Passover. I'd never been to a meal like this before, where each item represents something meaningful and different. To name a few, there was maror (bitter herbs) which represent the bitterness and hardships of slavery, charoset (fruit and nut paste) which represent the material used by the Jews to build storehouses during their time of slavery in Egypt, and 4 cups of wine to symbolize various promises. What an incredible tradition and celebration to have. I was thrilled to be a part of it and to learn a little bit more about the Jewish culture and rituals.

However, the meal wasn't what had the most impact on me. My supervisor was in charge of planning and organizing this service, and he had the brilliant idea to incorporate a foot washing ceremony during the service for the entire congregation, which I certainly thought sounded like a great idea since it could be a very powerful and meaningful event...that is until I learned that I, along with one other woman, were going to be the people washing every one's feet. Now that was something that certainly hadn't made my "must do/experience while in England" list. Yet as I was kneeling at people's tired and worn feet, doing my best to wash them carefully, I couldn't help but think that honestly, I wouldn't just randomly up and decide to wash some one's feet. It's fairly gross, especially when you know that you're going to eat food immediately afterwards and might not have time to wash your hands, and you get an up close and very personal experience with different ideas and levels of the importance of hygiene. But Jesus didn't think like that. He washed people's dirty, disgusting, smelly, and probably pretty messed up feet because they wore sandals all the time, and he did it on his own accord. During a meal. Willingly. Humbly. Full of unconditional love for those he was with, and this was one way he revealed part of how great his love is. He loves us enough to do the ultimate acts of service for us that most people would cringe at doing. Many people in the congregation probably weren't deeply affected by having their feet washed. But what about if Jesus had been there? What would it be like to have your feet washed by Jesus?

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

On Being English

On Wednesday afternoons I help out at a local primary school in a classroom for children that are struggling, or whom have essentially been temporarily removed from their regular classroom due to behavioural issues. These children, regardless of how many times they flick me off or shout swear words at me because life hasn't treated them as it should treat children of their age, make me ridiculously happy. Weekly, one of them asks me, “Heidi, do I speak American?” And in the most hilarious voice possible that only seems to heighten the North Yorkshire accent, he proceeds to repeat every word I say for the next half hour. Although I try to be very sincere and keep a straight face as I tell him he's getting closer and to keep practicing, he knows very well that I am hiding a smile. However, he is not so gracious to me when I perform my English accent for him, which to my dismay as I spend more time in England, has unintentionally come out more and more through my responses to poor unsuspecting and slightly bewildered people. Thus, to assist me in giving up my “atrocious” American habits, my new little friend has decided to dedicate his time in this classroom to teaching me how to be “proper English” so that when I return to the States I can bequeath my new found knowledge upon all my counterparts so that they in turn, will learn how to be “real, normal people”, as my friend informs me. Now, in all my 23 years of life, never have I once thought that I wasn't a real person, yet since coming to England, I have since been enlightened. :) So my friends and family, let me now, share my enlightenment. First of all, in north England, “tea” does not just mean merely a cup of tea, oh no. There are numerous meanings to this simple, three letter word, but it all depends on the time of day one is referring to. For instance, if I invited you over for tea at about “half past six” as they say in England (six thirty is absolutely unheard of language) it would mean that I am not inviting you over for an actual cup of tea, but I am inviting you over for the evening meal. Naturally, tea will be served, but that is only after everyone has finished eating the meal, as well as the pudding, which is in fact not “pudding” as we Americans know it, but is actually any type of dessert. However, if I invited you over at 10am for tea, that would mean that you are most likely going to receive a cup of tea, and possibly a biscuit, which to my bewilderment isn't in fact a biscuit at all in the way we think of it as some bread based doughy object you put jam on, but is actually something along the lines of a very hard and crunchy cookie that most people dunk in their tea in hopes of softening it before it is consumed. When greeting someone, it is always appropriate to say “Hiya! You all right?” A question which very rarely requires an answer. At first I was constantly concerned, thinking that everyone thought something was wrong with me or maybe I looked a little funny that day or like I hadn't slept that night, and that's why they were asking if I was all right. Yet thanks to my friend, I have now been informed that this greeting is almost like saying “Hi, I see you there, and I will acknowledge you, but please don't engage me in a conversation that could possibly become too personal or lengthy.” Moreover, in conversations, whether passing someone on the street or while hanging out with a friend, and I cannot emphasize this enough, there MUST NEVER be silence. When all else fails, talk about the weather. After all, this is England, and the weather could change at any moment. However, most of the time it seems to fall under the category that Brits refer to as “absolute rubbish”, where the sky is overcast and it's most likely raining, or going to be raining within the next couple minutes, or perhaps it recently stopped raining. Yes, yes. That is more likely. Also, when getting directions from someone who is English, you may want to think twice about it and just go search for a map. These are some directions I received when I first arrived in Beverley: “To get into the town center walk towards the rail road tracks (mind you, they weren't anywhere in sight) and turn left when you see a big bush by a post box. Carry on down that street until you find a snick-et (what in the world that was, I had no idea) and turn down it. Wind around, cross the drive, carry on down the snick-et which will meet up again after you cross the drive and go down it a ways, until you come to a pub, then turn left. There are two round-a-bouts, and on the second one you should take the third from the left turn. Follow the road and take a right at the green house (funny...all the houses here are made from bricks....) and walk until you come to a pedestrian only zone which will be marked by a post. Then you've reached town. If you see a cow, you've gone to far so turn around and reverse the directions.” To which I inquired about road names, only to learn that people don't really know the names of the roads around here, and the directions I received were excellent directions compared to most others I've gotten while living here. Maps are an excellent investment. Terminology and phrases that are important to know in England (and trust me, they're VERY important, for I am forced to review them with my little friend every single Wednesday): 1) It just does my head in (meaning something along the lines of the situation being annoying) 2) Winding me up (frustrating or irking me) 3) I just can't be bothered (whatever they should have done, they didn't because, really, they just plain didn't feel like it) 4) Trousers (pants...never, ever say pants unless you're referring to your underwear/knickers) 5) Nappy (diaper) 6) Track suit bottoms, or trackies (known to us as “sweatpants”, but considering what “pants” means in England....well...really...you never want to make the same mistake that I have and say “sweatpants”. It makes for a very awkward situation) 7) Rubber (eraser...really, I know what you're thinking) 8) Magnum (an amazing ice cream brand, so get your mind out of the gutter!) 9) Pavement (sidewalk...which funny story about this, I was typing this blog in a word document and the spell check kept changing “sidewalk” to “pavement”! My little friend also tells me every Wednesday that “sidewalk” just doesn't make sense, because it's paved and “sidewalk” has nothing to do with pavement. Clearly, Americans are odd creatures) 10) Ta (thank you) 11) Shattered/Knackered (very tired) 12) Thingy (EVERYTHING is referred to as “thingy” so you have to follow conversations along very closely to actually know what “thingy” is in hopes of even somewhat remotely following the conversation) 13) Jumper (which is in fact not a dress which I discovered after the initial shock I encountered when my supervisor (who is a male) told me his was going to put on his jumper, yet something more along the lines of a sweatshirt) I hope that you have had as much fun learning through reading this as I have learning through living the English culture these past 8 months. Now, I trust and hope that you are all well, and that you, like myself, feel like brand new enlightened people thanks to my little friend, ready to live life the proper English way.

Friday, February 11, 2011

Be the Change

First of all, I am so sorry for the massive gap it has been between this blog post and my last one! My life has been chaotic, to say the least, what with my computer not functioning to the point that it no longer turns on to work becoming increasingly busy to my mom visiting me for a good portion of February.

When I first came to Beverley I thought I had entered a utopia, a "Pleasantville" in most respects. Here lies a quiet quaint village where, after living and working in one of "the worst neighborhoods in Denver, Colorado" even the poor seemed to have enough here due to the UK's incredible welfare system. Yet the more time I spend here, the clearer my vision becomes. The ideal of pure contentment here has vanished, people seek more things materially and still are overwhelmed with dissatisfaction per say.

A lady I know here told me that her job bores her. It no longer challenges her, and she's alone for the majority of her time at work. She dreads retirement, as the primary thing awaiting her is tea and cake at parlors, cleaning the house, and, most daunting for her, becoming a full-time carer, leaving this incredibly driven, goal oriented woman feeling like she has little purpose as a housewife. Yet in spite of her lack of enthusiasm for her job, she refuses to search for another, for, in her own words, she's done her work too long, is too comfortable, and change seems to be too much. Comfortable, yet broken. Hurting. Someone I have seen as the "perfect" woman, as she always has her life held together and in the perfect order regardless of what transpires, suddenly became not so "perfect".

The chorus of one of my favorite songs by Brandon Heath says:

"Give me your eyes for just one second,
Give me your eyes so I can see.
Everything that we keep missing,
Give me your love for humanity.

Give me your arms for the brokenhearted
The ones that are far beyond my reach
Give me your heart for the ones forgotten
Give me your eyes so I can see."

For just one second, because our weak human nature could endure little more. But in that brief second, what would we see? The brokenness buried behind a smile, the perfection that is really unbearable torture, the emptiness, loneliness, dissatisfaction with life, fear, envy, hate, dishonesty, suffering, the needs. In a flash, our perception of every person we saw in that moment would be radically transformed, and we would know them for what they are: Human. Broken. It's everywhere. Lurking around each bend in the road. We can see it if we take the time to search someones eyes, their disposition, their nonverbal communication. It says it all if we only take the time to question and pay attention.

Yet there is beauty in the brokenness. A hand reaches out to help, someone does something kind, love is revealed through a friend, an acquaintance, a complete stranger. Healing amidst the anguish. How many people are hurting that we don't know about? It could be anyone, even our closest friend. What kind of an impact can I have by setting aside my selfishness and my busy life and actually pay attention, reading between the lines, watching actions and body language? How different could I make the world?

Ghandi said to be the change you wish to see in the world. Now, when first read that sounds like a phrase someone could quickly breeze over and say, oh, well that's a nice idea. But when dwelt on, allowing the concept to sink in, there is so much power in those few words. With that sentence comes great responsibility that can have a huge impact if we all partake in our share. Be the change.

At St. Nicholas Church we had a Lent service tonight that focused on working out the kinks you have in your life, purifying yourself, being transformed by Christ, starting over, and yes, it was even about brokenness. One of the Bible verses we read came from Isaiah 58:6-7, which says, "Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke? Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter-when you see the naked, to clothe him, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?" We often ask why there is so much suffering in the world, why there is starvation, why there are so many needs. A great amount of the answer to those questions lies primarily in our own hands and in these Bible verses. Be the change. Out of all the verses I read tonight these from Isaiah stood out to me in particular. We should walk with these people, not in front of them, not behind them, but aside them, accompanying them in their journey. We should help those who are broken, those who are struggling, whether they are rich or poor, for as brothers and sisters in Christ, this is what we are called to do.